Today I miss you.
Maybe yesterday I didn’t miss you yet I saw your shadow when I woke up and opened the curtains to the rising sun.
But today is different, now it is the setting sun who reminds me of you. The different tones of red. The exotic shaped clouds.The color fest that these two build up.
And I notice that I miss you, maybe I love you, but I do not ache anymore. Maybe now I learned to enjoy shooting stars. I understood that we can’t expect these flying spells to come. They just appear unexpectedly. And we can’t hold on to when we finally get to admire one. It will pass, enchant and continue its own way.
So I didn’t expect you. So now I can’t hold on to you. Nor expect you to come back.
So today I miss you because I am still tender and memories are still fresh. Yet these are mature enough to only show themselves sporadically. I missed you today, thought about you yesterday, but forgot you last week and maybe will dream you only once more.
I believe that tomorrow I might simply wake up and think about nothing, maybe myself or the future. And this I fear so much, yet I know that it is my only option now. The next shooting star wont be enjoyed nor seen if I keep remembering the first one I ever saw.
Do you remember the first flying star you saw? I don’t. That’s why every single one is so precious and unique. Sincere love will always be this way, precious, as never before, unique and beautiful enough to seem as the first and best ever.
So I do miss you, yet I am passionate enough to let you go and simply be still while some other shooting star crosses my way and shows me love, for the first time, again.
José Andrés Arvide