I want to feel alive

Like a timed bomb, a ticking is resonating in the most turbulent part of my chest. Air and space seem to reduce as if an external pressure was pushing my soul against the earth. But contrary to anything alien to me, this pressure is an implosion from my own chaotic mind. A need to expand, to run, to be doped and taken to all the unbalanced limits is present and born every second. A need to disperse all fear but to be inyect necessary quantities of anxiety to be able to feel alive is searched. Adrenaline, drugs, love, unknow… A need of all these to simply find an illusory peace and motivation, a simple addict to lust and passion. A war between the search of happiness and the need of pureness is born. I want to feel alive yet tranquility is never felt in this road. If I ever were to find perpetual peace, probably death would be the only place were I could find it. Let chaos posses my flow, I want to feel alive.

Jose Arvide

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