I dont tend to write about my personal life. Usually I just philosophize, judge and confuse my self with abstracts ideas of life, which yet they are meaningful to me. But the situation I’ve encountered during the last 24h has made my heart confuse and dance along with the rhythm of first sight love. Yesterday around 10pm I met a girl, from Norway. Her name, Mathilde. Since I saw her I knew she was diferent. Really happy, lovely and beautiful. Beautiful blue greenish eyes which take you so deep that the ocean seems like an empty pond of water. Crazy hair which tunes all the monotony into a higher much rhytmic tune. Always smiling, care free yet so compressive and helpful with people. Happy life lover would describe her perfectly. Intelligent and curious as one can be.
So the thing with Mathilde is, that I’ve spend some meaningful hours with her, some real exiting hours. During these few miraculous hours, I’ve adventured through my mind and heart. I discovered how little I know about love and the way I love. I discovered about my fears and expectations, I discovered how little I know about life, even though I keep writing about it. I discovered about how my mind can day dream for a useless meaningless and chauvinistic kiss from a girls I just met.
Mathilde help me convince myself, even more about how beautiful life is, how beautiful experiencing is and how beautiful loving is. Mathilde didn’t turn into an obsession, don’t take me wrong, but she became an platonic love. Not as intense as a real platonic Shakespeare like love, but all I would love is a kiss from her, a small delicate kiss. I want to know what it feels to kiss a girl who inspires so much happiness, confidence and curosity. I would love to experience what it is to laugh and kiss a girl who makes me think Im not the only insane.
But as I said, its all day dream, its all transcurring and impermanent. All this day dream and first sight love might be away in matter of hours, right when she leaves. But something Mathilde has printed on me, something which are not the dreams about escaping with her and adventuring all throughout the world, is that she reminded me that life is such a miracle. She reminded me that life is perfect, and all the experiences we can possibly live in it makes life such a nostalgic, magical trip.
Probably I will be able to know you better in the future, or maybe all this is just my stupid brain messing with me once again, but either way, I’ve felt uncountable butterflies in my stomach since I said hi to you, a number that can only be similar to the number of stars I see on the sky.
Thanks life for putting so many beautiful and exiting experiences along my way. Thanks life for being the best teacher ever. Thanks Matilde, for showing me that love is the most tricky, yet powerful and permutating thing in the universe.
I will now go to sleep, knowing that I understand my self better than I did before I said hi to you on the hallway.
Bisous pour toi.